Can’t help falling in love with you

Dearest Sunshine,

I would trade the sun for you if I could because I know that you brighten up my day better than all the galaxies and stars put together but I know its pretty messed up right now. I wish I could write you a million love songs so that even when we are apart, I will always be there by your side and you will never ever be alone again.

But you know I can’t. But hey, you have Monica and I have Chandler so we’ll be fine right?

Who am I kidding. We are broke in the best and most beautiful way possible. Drunk on stars and in love.

SO, I LOVE YOU. But I don’t.

Its been a few days since you said the same thing, on my rooftop, singing “Hey there Delilah”but except for Delilah, you took my name. Agh Poor Delilah but honestly, my name sounded odd in that song ( I blame my name and not you. Umm maybe you too. I hope you smiled at this lameness. I bet you did now). So, I looked at the sky, the stars and then at you and you were looking at me and maybe I knew why. You said you wanted to talk and my heart took a step back and stopped beating, my conscience warned me and I knew it wouldn’t be easy.

In no time you came and sat beside me and with so much effort you finally told me that you love me. I can still see it all, how pure and how genuine your love is and by the way you confess, I knew you had rehearsed a lot. My mind ran back to all our memories. You have always been my home, my saviour how can I ever not love you. I kept silent. And I saw you tremble and your voice began to break. I love you too but- I began. I saw the colour draining from your face and didn’t speak anymore. “But” you repeated and I reached for your hand, it was cold and you pulled away silently just the way you walked away. I swear I felt as if I was going disappear into thin air, as if I had no strength left in me. I sat down there, completely numb and shocked. Not a single thought occured to me at that point. Everything went silent.

And, umm, I heard you friends telling you that’s it’s over mate and it’s never easy to walk away. You said you want to stay.

I tried sleeping but even at 2 am I was wide awake just when I received a message and even before opening it, I knew it was you.

“Hey”

I felt so relieved I replied back as fast as possible and then

“Delilah, go to sleep. Everything is fine.

Well, A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they’ve got planes and trains and cars
I’d walk to you if I had no other way.”

And not the proposal, not that night, not all these loneliness but this one text broke me. I knew you meant every single word of the song.

I will forever be your Delilah but I know, nothing will ever be the same and yes, you have all the rights to blame me. I am sorry. I cried and stayed awake all night and I know you did too.